There is nothing more frustrating to me than not getting what I want. It drives me crazy. It may sound like an unreasonable thing to say but it's actually more common than most people think. It's funny how this blog came about.. I'm frustrated because I can't draw what I want.. It's like having a different point of view and trying to convince someone else and they keep misunderstanding you or disagreeing with you. My hand is disagreeing with my brain and now my heart is disagreeing with everything because the fact that my hand won't do what it's told is fucking with my passion for fashion LOL. FUCK!
I know, I blog about bullshit but funnily enough.. Someone on myspace told me that he reads them lol and another one said one mans bull shit is another mans treasure or somethin like that.. so I guess my bullshit must be entertaining lol.
*looks at jumpsuit drawing* GRR!!!!!!!!!!!
I want to go jump off a bridge just because my jumpsuit doesn't look right.. this really makes me question whether I am really in the right industry because I'm sure people who looooove Fashion, don't get insane like this lol.... hmmm but then again.. I don't know anyone like me. I have a really quick temper and I'm impatient. I don't remember getting mad when I would learn rap LMAOOO!! Yeah, I'm lame like that.. You would never catch me rapping though... Only in the privacy of my room .. when I'm a alone.. Maybe I should quit Fashion to pursue my rap career like the rest of Myspace.. haha J/P or maybe I could make some fan signs for some stink rappers that are friends with Souljah boy lol.. Or maybe I could rename my myspace page to Ashlie BadAss Bitch or Official page of Ashlie Martin or Official page of Ashlie Badass Bitch Martin HAHAHAHA.... and then put a pic of me half naked then I can go on random peoples pages and call them baby and honey ... LMAOOO man I am having a goooo .. you really should be ashamed of yourself..
The part about the rap thing though.. There are few friends of mine that have music on there... They're humble though.. Not like the people that leave all that advertising all over your status updates lol.. There are only 3 on myspace that I would give props and that would be Feln, Zarif and Kemizt.. the rest pretty much suck. Lol.
I have no idea how this blog went from me talking about "Not getting what I want" to "music on myspace" hahaha.. You can imagine the kind of conversations I get into.. I'm a chatterbox.. anyone who has the pleasure of talking to me.. Would know that I have far more than my fair share of things to say...
I love Declan... I love success... I love hearing from my favorite emailerr... I love waking up to a txt from Louis, I love getting a cuddle from Kat, I love to listen to Prince or Diana Ross in the morning, I love it when everything falls into place, I love to catch myself becoming a better person, I love to get frustrated with my life then let everything that is wonderful ease the discomfort. I love talking to myself through my blogs. Yes, I love to show my legs off... and everytime I run my hand along that smooth skin.. i thank my grandmother for her good genes lol.. I like taking pics of myself when I just woke up because my idea of beauty is the kind your husband has the pleasure of seeing... I wouldn't want people to think that I wake up looking like I walked straight off the cover of a magazine because that is not reality.. Natural beauty attracts the right kind. I love FOOD... I'm such a fatso .. I love kissing him for a whole 15 minutes everyday.. We would trade, no doubt.
Byeeee :))
p.s excuze any spelling or grammatical mistake.. too tired to care *cheesey grins*
Hey Ashlie - I found this and have been reading everything you are up to, basically I just want to say a BIG BIG sorry 2 you - 4 all the shit we have been through, 4 not telling you what I should of when I should of and making it fester until I became a nasty bitch. I regret all the mean things I have said to you, and wish with all my heart I could take them back, I have been reading your blog and I am super proud of you, it looks like you are doing really well for yourself and are now the person you were always destined to become - a strong beautiful loving woman. I am proud that I have known you and are soooo proud that you have become and awesome person. I am not asking for any forgiveness I just needed to tell you how I feel and how I am sorry and how I fucked up. You were my best friend and I let it go because I was jealous you had other friends and hadn’t made contact with me - that is probably the bottom line. I will never have a best friend like you again because I screwed it up and I will pay for it. I am so happy you are doing well Ash! You totally deserve it!
ReplyDeleteGood luck with everything – you are the bomb!!!
Renee - an old friend